REJECTION BY MESIOYE JOHNSON AFFABLE

REJECTION

The feeling that you're never the right words
in a book that the world accepts
is the beginning of loving your inexistent body,
like kissing a fading song into lips of a gone lover,
like entering a room that dissolves your body
on your palms & count how far you sink,
you are made to understand you must burn
your silence into fine melodies
singing you in black colours
before you become a flickering voice giving light
to dark boys like you searching healing in thistles;
exactly the way you try squeezing your flaws
in your smiles before realising your breath is pleated,
your body is an enemy to what prays
in your heart in tongues of your dreams,
you see silence, new, branded, other times rebranded,
such silence covering your body with the olive left
after frying your shadow with nightmares,
this movement is magical like your toes
arranging themselves as your new set of teeth
so your body would be able to walk away
through your voice, with that you should be free,
with that you should love yourself more
& not be told you are a good dark poet,
with that you should understand why
your cries are a bottle of vinegar brewing your old stories
into a taste of your new sadness;
sorry I said sadness, I only meant to say
we are nobody to what tells our body no, especially
to things that yells questions of hell under our skin,
I only meant to say despite leaving our heavy face
on a cracking cliff, we still don't fall
cos we are the embodiment of many falls
forming a cliff to experiment how heavy we are
to a world drilling us with cursed dictions;
planting a broken mirror in our vein to view our ruins,
running, running & running to hold Christ's cloth,
after pinning a drowning theme to cover our eyes,
till we blink our river dry & dry & dry & dry
& later discover we aren't the right words still.

— Mesi
# mesi # poetry # nostalgia # loss ,# love # life # l